fight another day
Today I learned again about trust, about friendship, about the body of Christ. I just want to cry, but I can’t. Why I can’t I don’t know. All I know is that my integrity has been tested and found wanting. God how can I expect to lead when I can’t handle myself? How am I to be an example when I haven’t displayed the strength needed to simply be totally honest? Is disguising the truth the same as lying? Has my relationship with people been weakened by this? Do I have the character necessary for ministry? My heart cries out, but no answer is forth coming. This time the answer can only be seen in the long scope of time. How my life is conducted from now on will determine whether I will be counted as worthy. I have a clean slate to begin again. I have been forgiven for my lack of total transparency. Lord help me receive the grace that you have granted me. Soften my heart to take full advantage of the mercy that you have poured onto me, despite my undeserving actions and attitudes.
Although being caught hurts, it is much like cauterizing a wound. On the battle field it is necessary at times to sear an open wound as to prevent infection. The patient knows it is necessary, but as the hot iron is thrust into the bloody flesh every instinct screams for the pain to stop. Some men hold the injured man down while one pulls the red hot iron from the flames. Many friends would leave a man to die rather than have go though the torment of watching him suffer, not a brother, not men who know what it means to suffer, who know the meaning of real pain, and know how it feels to heal. Would they deny their fellow warrior the chance to live again? These men know how it feels to lay stricken on the battle field, wishing that they had been alert to the last blow that left them crippled on the ground, they know what helpless is, more importantly they know what it is to win, to fight back from that wound, however deep it is and live to fight another day. Only an enemy would deny a person of that opportunity.
B held the iron today. As he humbly cleaned my wound and lovingly scorched it I wanted so badly to cry, but I couldn’t. All I could do was bite hard on stick between my teeth. By God’s grace this wound will heal. It will be a mark of another battle won, another testament to the caring concern of a friend. I can now heal. The Great Physician has once again bound up a broken hearted man, given freedom to a captive, and restored sight to a blind man and, He has used a brother to do it.
This is what sets us apart. We are not without faults. We are not anything more than anyone else. If anything, we are each the chief of sinners. But, we have each other. People talk about true community like it can never be grasped. That simply is not true. But it is not an easy to maintain. This bond is often birthed out of pain, and must be maintained though both good times and bad. Praise the Lord that I have brothers who are willing to cauterize my wounds so that I may return to fight another day.
Although being caught hurts, it is much like cauterizing a wound. On the battle field it is necessary at times to sear an open wound as to prevent infection. The patient knows it is necessary, but as the hot iron is thrust into the bloody flesh every instinct screams for the pain to stop. Some men hold the injured man down while one pulls the red hot iron from the flames. Many friends would leave a man to die rather than have go though the torment of watching him suffer, not a brother, not men who know what it means to suffer, who know the meaning of real pain, and know how it feels to heal. Would they deny their fellow warrior the chance to live again? These men know how it feels to lay stricken on the battle field, wishing that they had been alert to the last blow that left them crippled on the ground, they know what helpless is, more importantly they know what it is to win, to fight back from that wound, however deep it is and live to fight another day. Only an enemy would deny a person of that opportunity.
B held the iron today. As he humbly cleaned my wound and lovingly scorched it I wanted so badly to cry, but I couldn’t. All I could do was bite hard on stick between my teeth. By God’s grace this wound will heal. It will be a mark of another battle won, another testament to the caring concern of a friend. I can now heal. The Great Physician has once again bound up a broken hearted man, given freedom to a captive, and restored sight to a blind man and, He has used a brother to do it.
This is what sets us apart. We are not without faults. We are not anything more than anyone else. If anything, we are each the chief of sinners. But, we have each other. People talk about true community like it can never be grasped. That simply is not true. But it is not an easy to maintain. This bond is often birthed out of pain, and must be maintained though both good times and bad. Praise the Lord that I have brothers who are willing to cauterize my wounds so that I may return to fight another day.
posted by Anonymous at 4:33 PM
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